I am 48 years old and have been living with obsessive-compulsive disorder since I was a child. I was officially diagnosed when I was 27 and have run the gamut of medications for not only OCD, but anxiety and depression too. I’m under the care of a doctor for all three.
I live in a small town in Virginia with my husband and cats. I have degrees in English, and I work as a newspaper reporter for a weekly paper.
When I was first diagnosed with OCD, my doctor told me that I would probably be on medication the rest of my life, but the symptoms should become milder as I aged into my 40s.
My symptoms are nowhere near as bad as they were when I was first diagnosed. But I’m in my late 40s and still struggle daily with OCD.
I am currently going through a phase of checking, but I also have issues with germs, especially regarding bathrooms. I obsess about things I may or may not have done that could cause harm to others. I still try to assuage my anxiety with certain repeated words and prayers.
OCD is exhausting, as I am sure anyone who suffers with it knows. But the older I get, the more demoralized with OCD I become. I wonder what my life would have been like without it. I think about what I may have accomplished if I hadn’t had OCD, or if I had not allowed OCD to affect my life so much.
I have never talked a lot to others about my OCD, at least not specifically. With this blog, I hope to finally be truthful about the effects of OCD on me and on those around me.
I also want to use this blog to consider the questions I ask myself about OCD. I hope by writing and especially by receiving comments from you, I will gain some understanding.
I plan to write about my past and my present struggles and triumphs with OCD, anxiety and depression. I will share news I learn about the conditions.
My posts will include references to my husband, who is supportive of me even though he doesn’t fully grasp the frenzies I experience when I am deeply into an OCD episode. He has seen me at my worst and still loves me.
My cats will also be present in my posts. They have been instrumental in making my OCD, and my life, better, and they are very dear to me.
My plans are to write three times a week, on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
I am not an expert on OCD, depression or anxiety. I just know what it’s like to suffer from them. I urge you to seek the help of doctors if you suffer symptoms of these conditions.
I hope you will comment, because I definitely want to hear from you. I ask that you not use insulting or vulgar language.
So here I go! I hope you enjoy the blog and will share your insights.