Thursday, January 22, 2015

Waiting and anxiety

I haven’t been very active in the blogging world lately, and I apologize for that. I miss you!
I thought I was on the road to recovery, but the cough and other symptoms came back with a vengeance. I just haven’t felt very good.
But life goes on, doesn’t it?

I am waiting to hear some news that would create a change in my life.
I applied for a job that would actually be for less hours than I work now, and would still allow me time for my editing business. And the new job would pay significantly more.
I had my interview Wednesday (thank goodness I didn’t have a coughing fit at the same time). And now I’m waiting.
And I’m not good at waiting.
It’s all wrapped up with OCD and my craving for certainty. I want to know right now that everything is going to work out, that everyone is going to be OK, that the change I want to happen is going to happen.
But that’s not how life works, is it?

I’ve been trying some mindfulness techniques to help me deal with my anxiety. All I have is right now, I remind myself. I focus my senses on what’s around me right now, the sounds especially.
I also try to accept what is. I have done all I can in the matter. The rest is out of my control, and I have to accept what the outcome will be.
And I focus on what’s most important to me regardless of anything else that goes on in my life: Larry, Chase Bird, my spiritual life, writing, service to the world.

My techniques to help with the waiting and uncertainty aren’t perfect, but they are helping me to be able to deal with the anxiety so much better than I used to. I love that there are things I can do to help myself in that way.

Do you have a hard time waiting for news, good or bad?



12 comments:

  1. I hope you get the job, wishing you good luck. And I hope you feel better soon.. Have a happy day!

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  2. Changing things in your life is never an easy thing but I think we all must try to "shake" things up once in awhile. Less hours more money, sounds good. It will happen or not, there is nothing you can do about it waiting is the hardest. Good luck and get well. HUGS HUGS B

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  3. Good for you, all the way around!! Fingers crossed that what is suppose to happen, will happen!!

    I am kinda' lay back, I don't really have much to worry about......and waiting for news, I can't remember anything happening lately in my "almost" exciting life that I had to wait for. I'll get back to you if I think of anything ;)

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  4. Yes, waiting is hard, no question about it. But you're getting through it, Tina. Good luck and I hope you get what you want!

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  5. I hope you get this job! It sounds fantastic.

    One thing I recognize in my own anxiety issues is, anxiety and excitement feel the same. It's easier for me to call it anxiety because, well, if I called it excitement and what I wanted didn't come to pass, I'd feel crushed. I'm working on letting the excitement in more, no matter the outcome.

    I don't know if that makes any sense or is applicable to you at all, but that's my life in a nutshell. :)

    I hope you make a full recovery very soon. A lot of people seem to have that crud.

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  6. i have a difficult time waiting and worrying. i'm so glad you're looking to find a better fit for you and your time and how it is spent! fingers crossed for you! and worst case, you are exactly where you are today with nothing lost because of it.

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  7. When I know news is coming I am continually checking email or phone messages or the mail. Yes, you could say I have an issue with it!

    But I hope you get the news you want with the job. It sounds like a wonderful opportunity and certainly they'd be lucky to have anyone who writes as well as you do. I hope you hear something very, very soon!

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  8. I am not very good at waiting either. It sounds like this new job would be a better fit for you timeless and so I am hoping you get good new soon....

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  9. Best of luck to you in this competition. I'm pretty low key. Yes, I would like to know things sooner but I can wait.

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  10. The colds and flues this year are really bad. I had one and was just getting over it then was hit with another. I hope everything with your job works out. Please keep us posted.

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  11. Well that's very exciting and in my opinion you have the worst part (the interview) over! I hope it works out for you.

    I confess that I had a pre-interview for a job last week and it caught me off guard (I had no idea they did such a thing, and was driving when they called) and I totally BLEW it. Sigh. I'm sure it's all for the best, one way or another.

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  12. Good luck!! So much of OCD revolves around certainty/uncertainty, that waiting to find out what's going to happen seems especially hard. But in every case, the time passes, and I look back and think, what was I so worked up about? It doesn't seem to help with the next time, though. :)

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