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| Our second batch of leaves awaiting town pickup. |
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| So many more leaves left to fall. |
Somehow, I let my blog anniversary
pass without remark. Nov. 14 was my third “blogiversary.” The time has flown by
for me. I really have a hard time grasping that I’ve been a part of this blog community
for so long.
Before I wrote my first blog post on Nov. 14, 2011, I had
never shared a lot about my mental health with others.
As I began posting on the blog, as
much as I wanted to be as open as possible about OCD and depression, it was difficult
for me to decide what to share and what not to share, and how to express
myself.
I had spent a good portion of my
life hiding my OCD. Occasionally, I shared with a friend that I had OCD, but I
never offered details about what that meant for me in my daily life.
I was a little more open about my
depression because that seemed to be a bit more acceptable to others, but,
again, I shared few details with others.
I have become more comfortable
writing about how OCD and depression fit into my life and how I deal with them.
I am more comfortable sharing how I live my life while “bringing along” these
mental illnesses.
Recently, I discovered that
talking about OCD with another person—speaking about it instead of writing
about it—is a whole different experience for me.
As I was talking with this person,
I felt more self-conscious about revealing the details about OCD than when I
write about them.
Just speaking out loud about OCD
jarred me. I heard the words coming out of my mouth, giving explanations about
obsessions and compulsions, and I thought, “This
disorder is weird. What is this person going to think?”
The experience was a positive one,
and I’m glad I talked about OCD. Each person I talk to, each person who reads
my posts, may learn a bit more, may understand this “weird” disorder a little
more.
And if the person is experiencing
OCD symptoms, then maybe he or she can be encouraged to get treatment.
I was reminded that sharing such secrets—which we could argue shouldn’t be secrets because having OCD is nothing
to be ashamed of—with others isn’t easy.
We have the right to privacy.
There is nothing wrong with keeping close to our hearts things we don’t want to
or need to share with others.
But for me, sharing my secrets can
help show others they are not alone.
Have you ever found relief in
revealing a secret?
